The "S" word.

Shameful.

Scandalous.

Secret.

When most Christians think of sex, they think of a negative, dirty act that is forbidden.

"I think that many believers treat sex as a shameful act because their view of sex is a 'carry over' from the way they were raised as children," said Larry Freeman, Senior Pastor of New Brighter Day International Ministries in Nashville, TN.

Sex is everywhere. On billboards. On commercials. On radio. On television. On your next door neighbor who won't keep her blinds shut. Everywhere. But, for the most part, media - not the church - has played a significant role in portraying sex to be THE principal thing. Meanwhile, the church plays this hush hush game surrounding sex. It's no wonder that a modern-day believer buys into all of the smut about sex we're force-fed by popular culture.

In 2003, Professor David Buckingham and Dr. Sara Bragg at the Centre for the Study of Children, Youth and Media at the University of London conducted a study that showed that two-thirds of young people turn to media when they want to learn about sex - the same percentage of kids who ask their mothers for information and advice.

The report, 'Young People, Media and Personal Relationships,' studied young people (aged 10-14) between June 2001 and July 2003 on their interpretations and responses to the sexual content they encounter on mainstream television and how they use these representations in forming their own understandings of sexual and interpersonal relationships.

This included children's and teen programs as well as 'family viewing' in the form of soap operas, sitcoms and talk shows.

Were these young people to blame? If they can look to Dora the Explorer to learn Spanish or Rachel Ray to cook a good thirty-minute meal or Steve Harvey's Morning Show for advice on men, why wouldn't they turn to the media for a good ole fashioned lesson on sex?

It's the world's job to capitalize on sex. It sells. And, people are captivated by it.

In the United States, the pornographic film industry has an estimated 200 production companies in the region employing as many as 1,5000 performers, making up to 11,000 films and estimated to earn as much as $13 billion a year.

In 2002, there were at least 2,500 strip clubs in the United States generating estimated revenue of $3.1 billion. By 2010, the number of clubs in the U.S. has grown to approximately 4,000.

The use of sexually suggestive images to sell just about everything really emphasizes the point that sex is a merchandiser's best friend.

Still, this kind of over-saturation does not give the average person a healthy, balanced look at sex. The more perverse the better, actually. So, what happens when giving teen boys blow jobs in the back seat of a convertible or promoting women with leather whips become the normal way of looking at sex?

"The sex industry has corrupted the general view of sex by debasing the act itself, so that the average person's view on sex is skewed in that it seems to be only a physical act," said Freeman.

Freeman says the Bible speaks about sex numerous times and it does not render the same view that many seem to have on the subject matter.

Sex was created by God to be enjoyed within the boundaries of marriage between man and wife, said Freeman. He cites the following:

Genesis 4:1 And Adam knew his wife, and she conceived.

Proverbs 5:18-19 "Let your fountain be blessed, and the wife of your youth...let her breasts satisfy you at all times; and always be enraptured with her love."

Mark 10:6-9 "But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife; and [the two] shall be one flesh."

Hebrews 13:4 "Marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefiled."

"Sex is not taboo in the Bible, so I don't see why it should be among believers. A question I would ask is what age group is this topic taboo with and why? Do they have a biblical view of sex or is it their own cultural view?" said Freeman.

Belief Blog contributor and author, Jonathan Acuff argues that most Christian sermons rarely address these references, or they skirt over them as to not call attention to the s-word.

"That's what we've been told. That God and sex don't go together. And if you say something enough times, people start to believe it's true...You can't have both in the same bottle. They're oil and water. Cats and dogs. Spencer and Heidi. They just don't go together," said Acuff.

Vicky Joseph, 24, a Public Relations and Corporate Communications major at Barry University used to think the same thing - that sex should not be spoken about.

"I saw sex as a negative act because it was introduced to me as a taboo subject by my peers and family members. 'Never Mention the S-e-x Word,' said Joseph, who grew up in the church.

Joseph never heard about the birds and the bees from her parents. She heard about sex for the first time while in elementary school and from watching television.

She claims that learning about sex this way was harmful for her because her view became shaped based on media and other kids who also did not have a clear understanding of what is was.

To this day, her church does not touch on sex very often. If it is discussed, it is done so very vaguely for no one to understand it as a gift intended to bring pleasure and excitement for two people.

"For years, Christian publishing would not publish on sex," said Michael Sytsma, a Christian sex therapist with the Sexual Wholeness Ministry based in Duluth, Ga. "If they did, it was so heavily edited nothing of value was left. Now, more and more pastors are preaching about it on Sunday, though you still do not see classes in seminaries. We are seeking to do that."

Books like Intended For Pleasure by Ed and Gaye Wheat and The Gift of Sex by Clifford and Joyce Penner were titles recently published by Revel and Thomas Nelson publishing houses.

Still, as a result of the tremendous lack of sex education within the faith community, there are two mentalities that have flourished: those that buy into the media's hot and heavy, perverted sex industry and become sex maniacs before they reach their twenties and those who have been made so petrified by the word, let alone the act, that they do not know how to satisfy their spouse in the bedroom.

The Sexually Promiscuous Type

Because of the limited information about sex they receive from the church, they start down their own trail of exploration. Masturbation. Groping. Fallatio. Unprotected sex.

But, if a church refuses to educate about condoms because they believe that they promote sexual activity, then there is more likelihood that the young parishioner will contract a venereal disease from the sexy biker down the block or impregnate one of the girls in the church youth group.

According to a 2002 study by the Kaiser Family Foundation and Seventeen magazine, more than a quarter of 15- to 17-year-old girls say that sexual intercourse is "almost always" or "most of the time" part of a "casual relationship."

So, a horny teenager with little to no education is a dangerous combination, especially if this person begins to embrace another forbidden extension of the s-word -- the world of pornography.

"The use of pornographic films from whatever source introduces [a] possible danger into your sexuality," said Melissa and Louis McBurney, M.D., Real Sex columnists for Marriage Partnership.

The individual will begin to be aroused by behaviors of sexual deviance such as the ménage trois, the female dominatrix, and voyeurism that serve to transport the viewer to a world so far from the purity of sex spoken about in the Scriptures.

"Those images may also create a basic sense of dissatisfaction with yourselves since most couples don't maintain or ever achieve the sensual appearance of porn actors and models. The whole industry is based on illusions and those lies can lead to death of your relationship as well as your sexual satisfaction," said the McBurneys.

The Scared, Silent Type

So, what happens when you've been guilted into believing that sex is meant for the purposes of reproduction and should be treated in the most emotionally detached, pleasureless manner possible?

You, my friend, are the Christian guy or girl who needs to let out the roaring animal within you and go at it with your life mate.

"The missionary position can get pretty monotonous after years of being married. This will cause sexual tension in the marriage and may cause either the husband to stray," said John Peterson, a graduate from Montclair State University with a degree in Family and Child Services. "It's important to try different things in the bedroom, different positions, foreplay, passionate kissing, oral play, lingerie, gel for her, even trying to have sex in different rooms in the house."

Wheat and Christian marriage counselor Gloria Okes Perkins point out that "...a biblical understanding of sex dispels false fears and inhibitions. ...The Scriptures tell us clearly that the joyous sexual expression of love between husband and wife is God's plan. ...Uninformed people have actually considered the Victorian view to be biblical because they think the Bible forbids all earthly pleasures."

Joseph admits that time and maturity in the studying of the Word of God has changed her perspective regarding the "S word."

"I view sex as a consuming fire. It can be good or bad if it's used in the proper context. Fire can be used to give warmth around a camp fire on a cold night, or if you get too close to the fire you can get burned," said Joseph. "I view sex the same way, God created sex as a form of expression between a husband and wife in the sanctity of marriage which a beautiful thing. Outside of that said marriage sleeping with multiple partners can cause heartbreak, unwanted pregnancy or one can be susceptible to sexual transmitted diseases."